Hallie
Starbound Butterfly
Life's Oxymoron
Posts: 205
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Post by Hallie on Nov 10, 2005 21:53:46 GMT -5
Well, by now everyone knows that I have anxiety attacks and other issues of the brain. Tonight just moved me up a space in the monopoly game of insanity. If this keeps going much more, I'm not sure what's going to happen. All I know right now is that I just got over a massive attack and feel as if I'm about to have another. My heart's beating out of my chest... my breathing is refusing my attempts at slowing it with deep breathing exercises... And I'm frightened.
It all started when I was getting my bills ready to be paid tomorrow and looked down at the calendar. All day I had thought it was Wednesday. Don't ask me, I'm a freaking moron. I looked down at the calendar on my computer and it said Thursday, 7:32pm. Well, that's when I freaked. I missed my parenting class. Now, I run the risk of going back to jail for violation of probation because I missed two classes. The first, though, was because I was in the process of being baker acted (which didn't pan out, they sent me home.)
So, now, no matter what, I either have to go back to jail, which they may mandate anyway, or go through another 20 hours (8 weeks) of parenting classes and pay another registration fee. I don't mind going back through the class, but I'm broke and I CAN'T go back to jail... I'm just so scared... I feel sick... should end this now...
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Pixie
Starbound Butterfly
faith and trust and pixie dust
Posts: 335
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Post by Pixie on Nov 10, 2005 22:31:27 GMT -5
*hugs shyly and slips away*
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Hallie
Starbound Butterfly
Life's Oxymoron
Posts: 205
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Post by Hallie on Nov 11, 2005 13:59:59 GMT -5
*Hugs the pretty pixie back and brings update*
This isn't that big of a deal as of yet. I tried to call my probation officer today, but as it turns out to be a holdiday (still not certain which one yet), she is not in her office and the phone just rings off the hook. I took that as a sign to just relax over the weekend. No reason in freaking out until Monday. But, just to let you all know, if I disappear from the face of the earth for a while, I'm not dead... just in jail... again. *Sighs* I'll keep you posted if anyone cares.
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Pixie
Starbound Butterfly
faith and trust and pixie dust
Posts: 335
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Post by Pixie on Nov 11, 2005 14:13:24 GMT -5
I care and the holiday is Veteran's Day or what used to be called Armistice Day-it is a day to remember and honour all those that died in service for our country as well as all those that served to keep us free-at the 11th hour on the 11th day of the 11th month the Armistice or Treaty was signed that ended World War I.
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Post by Razorblade Butterfly on Nov 11, 2005 14:13:38 GMT -5
Veterans Day I think
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Post by Razorblade Butterfly on Nov 11, 2005 14:14:19 GMT -5
oh you beat me lol...
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Pixie
Starbound Butterfly
faith and trust and pixie dust
Posts: 335
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Post by Pixie on Nov 11, 2005 14:18:15 GMT -5
apparently I am the historian and resident old person here
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Hallie
Starbound Butterfly
Life's Oxymoron
Posts: 205
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Post by Hallie on Nov 11, 2005 14:44:24 GMT -5
I feel really bad now. I should have remembered that. My family is a military family and we always celebrated that or at least honoured it in some way. And thank you for the reminder. No wonder nothing's open today.
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Post by Serena Serenity on Nov 11, 2005 14:56:26 GMT -5
*snugs Hallie* Everything will turn out, somehow hunny. I know you and how much you love your son. Just think of that and all will be well. Even if I have to send the money I get somehow for the classes. I'll find the money. Borrow it from somewhere. How much is it?
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Pixie
Starbound Butterfly
faith and trust and pixie dust
Posts: 335
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Post by Pixie on Nov 11, 2005 15:04:55 GMT -5
honey you have a lot more on your mind that is more important right now*hugs tightly*
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Hallie
Starbound Butterfly
Life's Oxymoron
Posts: 205
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Post by Hallie on Nov 11, 2005 15:08:13 GMT -5
Don't you go trying to send me any money, Darlin. I can snag it off my parents. Its only like $25. I can't have you breaking yourself over me. I'm not worth it.
I've been very lucky to have friends like y'all. You all are so supportive, and I couldn't ask for better friends. That's more than I expected from these boards. Thank you.
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crowsrlaughin
Starbound Butterfly
.Welcome to the Machine.
Posts: 155
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Post by crowsrlaughin on Nov 11, 2005 15:12:35 GMT -5
Everything will be okay, Just try to explain if you can. I really hope everything turns out ok, and I care what happens to you. *thwaps* So don't say that. I'll keep you in my prayers as always :]
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Hallie
Starbound Butterfly
Life's Oxymoron
Posts: 205
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Post by Hallie on Nov 11, 2005 15:16:35 GMT -5
 *Ish thwapped* Yes, sir! *Salutes* Thank you. I just hope they give me a second chance rather than just throwing me in the slammer. Doesn't bode well for someone with an anxiety disorder who's been taking hards meds to go to a jail where they refuse to medicate you unless you're dying. Dun think I can handle that again. I'd end up in solitary. *Shudders* Okay, I dun wanna think about that.
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Post by Serena Serenity on Nov 11, 2005 15:37:25 GMT -5
*thwaps Hallie with the frying pan of doom* You are to worth it. Don't you dare say your not again, ever. You are an amazing person and I will do everything in my power to help you. You should know that. *snuggles bunches* I adore ya and you are in my thoughts.
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Post by Gibby on Nov 11, 2005 15:51:57 GMT -5
I agree with everyone else. Don't worry about it.....try to explain both reasons why you missed them. Maybe it won't be as bad as you are fearing? ~big huggles~ Yeah, I would chip in too....cuz you are definitely worth it!!!!!
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*Ish thwapped* Yes, sir! *Salutes* Thank you. I just hope they give me a second chance rather than just throwing me in the slammer. Doesn't bode well for someone with an anxiety disorder who's been taking hards meds to go to a jail where they refuse to medicate you unless you're dying. Dun think I can handle that again. I'd end up in solitary. *Shudders* Okay, I dun wanna think about that.
